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Our little family has been through a lot the past week... My mum had a stroke 6/24, and unfortunately passed July 1st from complications after the breathing tube was removed + the fact she had paralysis that took away the ability to swallow...She landed up with sepsis and my dad & I each held a hand until the bitter end, reminding her over & over how loved she is (now was) and cared for. My mum was one of my closest friends. She was my cheerleader. And she loved me no matter how much crap I put my family through. (I have Bipolar 1 Disorder & Dissociative Identity Disorder, which is almost traumatic for the loved ones tasked with being caregivers. We only found an effective treatment plan 2017, so there was 37 yrs of a nightmare roller coaster ride she made it through.) Even when everyone else told her to walk away & cut me off she defended me and loved me - even though I did not deserve it at times. She was like this with everyone really. When she met someone new she would go into the relationship with no judgments. She knew how to make people feel accepted and loved. And she loved uncondtionally. ...Well, until you screwed her over one too many times. Then she would politely bow out of the relationship. But at that point she had probably already given you two handfuls of chances to not be an a-hole lol and prove you are trustworthy & deserving of her renewed respect. She was, to put it simply, an absolutely amazing human being! A light in the darkness. And my mum fostered my love of nature and the outdoors. Little tidbit: She backpacked all over Europe before settling down with my dad. Greece all the way up to Great Britain. (She was Irish-Scottish. She has family in Scotland and Ireland, which is one of the reasons her trip included those non-european countries.) She LOVED skiing up until her arthritis got too bad to ski anymore. And she was the love of my dads life. His best friend. His soul mate. ...And now I am sitting in the same hospital my mum passed two days ago, waiting for my dad to come out of surgery. I had to rush him down here yesterday morning due to health condition that flared up. We got to the ER around 9:00 am yesterday, and he has been in the hospital since. ...I am worried to say the least, but have been assured there is no need; I am trying to believe them as I sit here in his hospital room writing this post, but it is a struggle as I think of my mum. (Deep Breaths. Acknowledge & Accept. It Is What It Is....) "I truly never learned what the words ‘I miss you’ were until I reached for my mom’s hand and it wasn’t there." |
LUE OutdoorsBlog by Samantha LUEgger. Archives
February 2022
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